The fact that sexual desire, for MOST women, is triggered by the feeling of emotional closeness. Part of this is her, and part of this is you. Female sexual desire evolved to seek a partner who will help take care of the infant for a few years … for MOST women, your attention turns her on more than your “equipment” does.
The first flush of brain chemistry “in love” does the triggering for both of you. But when it dies down - or dies out completely - both have to work at it. And that initial level of excitement that worked all on it’s own … now requires ongoing deliberate effort. The wife cannot keep the romance going on her own.
Without that emotional bonding, for MOST womenj, her body turns off. But if there is too much hurt happening, all the romance in the world won’t break through the self-protective barrier that the hurt builds.
