I never thought I’d be the kind of girl who downloaded a dating app. I used to roll my eyes whenever someone mentioned “meeting their boyfriend online.” It felt artificial - like shopping for a partner the same way you’d browse for shoes. But after one too many nights spent third-wheeling my friends, curiosity (and maybe loneliness) got the better of me.

The First Swipe

My first few days on the app were… overwhelming. It’s like walking into a digital cocktail party where everyone is trying a little too hard. There’s the guy with a shirtless mirror selfie, another holding a fish (why do they all hold fish?), and the occasional poet who writes things like “looking for my partner in crime.”

Still, once I got past the clichés, I actually started having fun. There’s something oddly empowering about deciding who you want to talk to - and who you definitely don’t. I matched with a few people who made me laugh, and I even went on a couple of genuinely enjoyable dates.

The Good, the Bad, and the Bizarre

Let’s start with the good: online dating works - if you know what you’re looking for. It made me realize how many interesting, smart, and funny people I would never have met otherwise. One guy I dated for a few months was kind, attentive, and actually listened when I talked (a rare gem, apparently).

But then, of course, there’s the bad - and the downright bizarre. Some men treat dating apps like a vending machine. Swipe right, send three messages, and if you don’t respond fast enough, they’re gone. Ghosting is practically a sport. And don’t even get me started on the “Hey” openers. If your entire first impression is a single word, maybe dating just isn’t your thing.

The Judgmental Truth

Here’s where I get a bit judgmental: I think a lot of people on dating apps don’t actually want to date. They want attention, validation, or a quick ego boost. It’s almost like social media with a flirty twist. I’ve noticed people are more interested in how they appear online than in making a real connection.

I also think some women - myself included - sometimes fall into the same trap. It’s easy to get addicted to the attention, to the dopamine hit of a new match or a compliment from a stranger. We all like to feel wanted. But at what point does that replace actually wanting someone back?

What I Learned

Online dating taught me a few things about myself. I learned that I value genuine conversation over perfect selfies, that chemistry doesn’t always translate through a screen, and that boundaries are incredibly important. I also learned that I can say no without feeling guilty.

Most importantly, it reminded me that finding love - or even just connection - is messy, awkward, and unpredictable, whether it happens online or in real life.

Would I recommend online dating? Absolutely. But only if you go into it with a sense of humor, a bit of self-awareness, and zero expectations.

Because honestly? Sometimes it’s not about finding the one. Sometimes it’s just about finding yourself in the process.